Honoring Our Fathers

With Father's Day coming up, we were asked to speak about the lessons we learned from our fathers at Sacrament Meeting for the Waimanalo ward. Sister Mundell loved and admired her father. It would be easy to talk about him because of all the fine qualities and good memories she has of him. However Elder Mundell knew this was going to be a difficult topic for him to talk about. While he loved his dad and he was a good decent man who loved his family, he didn't feel close to him and couldn't cite a lot of inspirational examples about his father. 

Cathy asked all of her siblings "What lessons did you learn from our father?" and these were some of the responses from her sisters: "He said don't think you're better than anyone else, but don't let someone think they are better than you. He loved us no matter where we were in our lives. He never judged. He had a lot of compassion for others." "Unconditional love. Never discouraged, only encouraged. Work hard, it will always pay off. Always give an honest days work for an honest wage. Extreme patience. Know when to stay quiet, and when to speak up." "He was without guile. Always kind. He loved his children unconditionally and was deeply in love with his wife, and called her 'so cute'." "He made me strong, independent and loving. I always knew Dad would be there for me. He always called me 'Miss America'.  I felt security from my parents." "Just be kind to all. Family first."

Cathy's tremendous parents, Reid (1927-1983) and Betty (1927-2002) Schofield 

So Sister Mundell focused on three lessons she learned from her father. 1) WORK HARD. 2. GAIN KNOWLEDGE and 3. LOVE EVERYONE. She talked about boxing up produce in the packing sheds to earn money for school, and when she asked him how he was going to help her go to college he opened the door and said, "There you go." Her father loved everyone he came in contact with -- when she was out in the community with him, he knew everyone and it was fun because he would talk to everybody and everybody wanted to talk to her dad. When Cathy was a little girl, she truly thought that her dad was a celebrity in town, because everyone wanted to talk to him. It was fun to be out with him!  

Elder Mundell felt inspired to go a different way. He asked his sons, "What lessons did you learn from me?" Their unanimous response was "financial responsibility". In addition, they said "Curiosity about solving puzzles and analyzing information. The value of good cooking. Putting your family's needs first. How to handle problems, such as knowing what you can fix and letting go of the rest. An example of service in the community and at church." "Knowing what your strong suits are and building on them. How to be loving and patient. Not pressuring your children if they decide to stop going to church." "A love for travel and adventure. Helping us learn and develop hobbies and interests. Accepting others and treating everyone equally." 

Dan's loving father, Arthur Mundell, 1915-1994

Elder Mundell said his father was from a different era, raised during the depression and drafted into World War II, where showing affection was frowned upon. He pointed out how a misplaced desire to support his family through a get-rich-quick scheme of raising chinchilla for fur coats ended up backfiring miserably. The family was forced to move from Southern California to Oregon to buy a chinchilla ranch, but he couldn't find suitable employment in Oregon so he lived 800 miles away in Long Beach until he retired and his kids were all out of high school. As a result, despite his best efforts he wasn't close to his children and he missed out on many of the things they did growing up. So from this Elder Mundell learned three very important lessons, what he did NOT want to do with his own life, from the mistakes his father made. 1) MAKE TIME FOR FAMILY. He chose being a weather officer in the Air Force because he would not be deployed away from his family for months at a time. 2) SHOW AFFECTION. Your children absolutely need to know you love them, by your words and by your actions. 3) LIVE WITHIN YOUR MEANS. Be frugal, and always save some of what you earn in a safe long term investment like index mutual funds. He said that approach has allowed him the security and the freedom to serve a full time mission after retirement. 

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